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From Learning to Live Again (unpublished 2017)

Stephen Kaufman : August 16, 2017 9:40 am : SL Kaufman

I’m still searching Learning to Live Again
For answers
To unasked questions
And continued confusions

Crossroads again
And always
As I enter new

I’m unwilling to let go
Of hopes and dreams
By settling for the safety
Of comfortable surroundings

At least until I know
That what I truly deserve
Is not within my reach
As this journey continues

In the meantime
I will continue risking
Continue exploring
And continue dreaming

For without that
I will have succumbed
To the ravages
Of my condition

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From “Learning to Live Again” (unpublished)

Stephen Kaufman : July 24, 2017 8:28 am : SL Kaufman

My existentialism has taken hold Learning to live again
As I find that I am retreating
Further and further
Into myself

I understand my need
For self-preservation
As well as the necessity
To break free of my own trappings

Nobody can possibly understand
What I am experiencing
And if I try to explain
I seem to find resistance

I must fight this war
On my own
I must learn to live again
By trusting my instincts

By conquering my fears
By speaking my mind
By continuing to do things
In my own way

And only then
Will I find the peace
Strength and confidence
To walk proudly towards my tomorrow

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My Walk – From “Learning to Live Again”, unpublished 2017

Stephen Kaufman : July 13, 2017 4:10 pm : SL Kaufman

Sometimes my walk is perfectlearning to live again
Like today
When the songs of my youth
Can touch me once again

And they remind me
Of a different time
When we were all searching
Though clouds got in our way

And it took me to that time
Innocent and free
When we actually cared
And tried to make a better world

So thank you Joni and Billy and Van
And Bob and James and Neil and Paul
And Stevie and Jackson and Elton
And all of the legends of that time

You were my heroes then
And are my heroes now
And I listen to you today
With a smile and a hope

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Random Thoughts from Volume 4 “Testing Love”

Stephen Kaufman : June 19, 2017 1:04 pm : SL Kaufman

Not afraid of deathTesting Love
It’s dying I fear
So I take each breath
Happy to be here


In touch with how I feel
And unafraid to share
Understanding it is real
And mine alone to bear


Feeling happy and sad
At the same time
Doesn’t make me mad
For these moments are sublime


My comfort zone
Has always been narrow
But it will need to expand
To accommodate tomorrow


So much to do
So much to say
Ideas to brew
For another day

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Book 5 “Learning to Live Again” – Wondering Where Time Went

Stephen Kaufman : June 9, 2017 10:05 am : SL Kaufman

Wondering where the time wentSL Kaufman
As it is now my enemy
For the youthfulness I feel
Is betrayed by the number

Life is about love and fear
And now I live in fear
For love and health have betrayed me
And rearranged everything

Each day is a challenge
But each day has its rewards
As the pain subsides
Into tomorrow’s memory

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The First Song I Wrote – Still Rings True Today

Stephen Kaufman : June 1, 2017 10:28 am : SL Kaufman

I was in college over 50 years ago when I picked up the guitar. It was the era of the singer-songwriter, led of course by Bob Dylan. This is the first song I wrote and it still rings true to me today.

Where is my directionFirst Song
I don’t know
Should I make corrections
I don’t know

It’s so hard to understand
Hard for me to plan
How will I ever know
I need to know

What is my purpose
I can’t tell
Will it all be worthless
I can’t tell

It’s so hard to understand
Hard for me to plan
How will I ever know
I need to know

The sands of time
Are running through my fingers
And the pace is fast
But the taste of life
It never lingers
Today suddenly is past

It is past

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From “Learning to Live Again”, to be published 2017

Stephen Kaufman : May 22, 2017 9:10 am : SL Kaufman

I’m now realizingLearning to live again
How lost I am
And how appropriate
The word is

I’ve lost strength
Vitality and sexuality
A sense of invulnerability
And friends along the way

And I’ve lost my path
A sense of purpose
A view of tomorrow
And someone to share it with

But I’m understanding
That finding my way
Out of this place
Will be learning to live again

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From the prologue to Book 5 “Learning to Live Again”, to be published sometime in the future.

Stephen Kaufman : May 8, 2017 9:28 am : SL Kaufman

Stephen kaufman“Finding Love” was published in November of 2015 and “Testing Love” in August of 2016. I had continued writing after our breakup in
November of 2014 accumulating enough poems and stories to continue the series with Book 5 “Holding On” and Book 6 “Moving On”. I realized, however, that the story of the end would have been just that and I decided that since I had emotionally moved past it, there was no need to embellish it. Instead, I am moving forward with this next book, “Learning to Live Again”.

In order to bridge the gap, however, and bring my journey up to date, I do want to discuss that over 2 year period where I found myself dealing with the incalculable pain of losing the love that I, at that time, had fully expected would take me to the end of my life, and the steps back I needed to take to realize that it was time to live again.

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From “Learning to Live Again” to be published late 2017

Stephen Kaufman : May 1, 2017 8:16 am : SL Kaufman

Learning to Live Again

Like the sky’s colors
At day’s end
So too must we face
Each day’s new wonder

Be it a challenge
A surprise
Or a burden to bear
We must rise to its calling

Delay is not an option
As plans must be in place
To clear the path
Towards the future we own

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Unpublished 2015

Stephen Kaufman : April 11, 2017 8:02 am : SL Kaufman

SL Kaufman

Feeling lost
Sad and uncertain
But unwilling to give in
To the appeal of nothingness


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