Saw a wise man today
As I continue to try
And make sense of
What has become of me

He started out by asking
How’s life
And an hour later
The answer still eluded me

I’ve always felt
That life is about love and fear
And right now I live in fear
And without love

I know that I am loved
But I can’t return it
And for me
That is debilitating

So I need to understand love
In ways I haven’t really explored
Even though I learned to love again
And found a love that still inhabits me

I have always looked at love
As a physical, passionate state
And that is missing right now
And maybe from now on

Sexuality played a big role
And that too does not exist
Except within me and unavailable
To others

I need the touch of someone I love
As I stroke her hair
Kiss her gently
And take her softly to me

I had it
Lost it
And continue to suffer
Without it

Is learning to live again
Learning to live without love
Or learning to redefine love
In the age of the aged

I haven’t given up
I just don’t know
But I’m completely open
To the answers